This year has been full of lots of moments. Proud moments, like my internship, sad moments, seeing my friends change for the worse, but, maybe the most prominent type of moment in my life is AWKWARD. No, not like that cute TV show where the brunette gets the guy in the end. I'm talking cringe-inducing, red hot blushing, lying awake in the middle of the night thinking "Why the F--- did I do that?" embarrassing. (Appropriately, my favorite song happens to be "Everything Is Embarrassing" by Sky Ferreira. If you haven't heard it, go listen to it NOW.) Without getting into all of the SNAFU details, just know that many of these moments involved members of the opposite sex that I sometimes was and sometimes wasn't interested in. I used to say I was going to stop being weird next semester. I would be that sweet, suave, sophisticated girl, the one who just breezes through life and has that summer quality about her that no one can really hold on to.
After a couple years of attempts, I'm still not there (and honestly, I didn't really try this year). But the sort of amazing thing is...it's ok now. My inability to keep my mouth shut, while I AM working on preventing social suicide, is part of who I am. I always have the best stories at parties and the ability to handle other potentially awkward situations and move on. Hell, once I even got COMPLIMENTED on my awkwardness! The other person said that I least I was being real and being myself. I think that's the most I can hope for. In the meantime, yes, I'll try to make sure not to say anything I'm not supposed to, but I'm bound to have some more uncomfortable situations, but I'll just smile hold onto them and laugh later.
(Side Note: I recently purchased a Rubik's Cube, and it was the 40th anniversary of said Cube, so hence the theme and title. But that art work is pretty cool, no?)
After a couple years of attempts, I'm still not there (and honestly, I didn't really try this year). But the sort of amazing thing is...it's ok now. My inability to keep my mouth shut, while I AM working on preventing social suicide, is part of who I am. I always have the best stories at parties and the ability to handle other potentially awkward situations and move on. Hell, once I even got COMPLIMENTED on my awkwardness! The other person said that I least I was being real and being myself. I think that's the most I can hope for. In the meantime, yes, I'll try to make sure not to say anything I'm not supposed to, but I'm bound to have some more uncomfortable situations, but I'll just smile hold onto them and laugh later.
(Side Note: I recently purchased a Rubik's Cube, and it was the 40th anniversary of said Cube, so hence the theme and title. But that art work is pretty cool, no?)